Thank you all who read and commented on my last post. I probably am getting paranoid, but the possibility of having everything blowing up in my face, however remote, scares me.
If only...things were different. Sound familiar?
I have had thoughts about changing my profile name to protect myself. But eventually decided not to.
I chose to use this name because of a special friend that I had lost to suicide during my Vietnam experience. The name has become a part of me in so many ways. It has linked me to him in a way. It has also come to represent the gay person within me.
This blog is a secret indulgence, which has given me a voice. This has meant a lot to me, more than these simple words can express. Thank you for helping me, an older man, understand the gay inner "boy" within me. The part of me that never got the chance to grow up.
My intent when I started this blog was to try and be a support to other people, especially those younger than myself. Those who may be struggling with being gay and how that creates so many conflicts within their lives. I just wanted them to know that they weren't alone. I had hoped that I might in some way lighten their burden, brighten their lives. I know that all of you, well most of you, have done that for me.
About Me
- Adon
- New England, United States
- Having been unable to break my silence about being gay or bisexual due to living in a conservative New England community, and being an active Mormon as well as being married to a wonderful woman, I will try to do so here. This is the story of parts my life, beginning when I was a young teenage boy. I have learned that being gay or bisexual can, in ways, be a lonely life. I was not actually alone, but many times it felt like I was. As a boy, I thrilled at the discoveries that I had made about my body and my physical and emotional attractions. I despaired when I realized I couldn't tell anyone. There were times when things didn't end well. There were some sad and traumatic experiences. But, there were also many joyful and wonderful life experiences that I wouldn’t have had if I had given in to discouragement along the way. I believe there is joy in living even with the challenges along the way. Be aware that I have been honest and to some degree explicit in my boyish descriptions of my budding sexual awareness. What I have written is what I felt, thought and experienced at the time. These particular posts are marked with a double star **.
5 comments:
It pays to be safe in this non-understanding world. I hope you can accomplish what you want here.
It makes sense to keep yourself safe. You could turn the blog into an "invite only" site. Perhaps take referrals from those of us whom you know from here.
You need to do what is best for you. Your memoirs here have been a help to me, I'm certainly not a youngster, but hey, experiences such as yours span the ages.
Peace <3
Jay
:-) Please don't stop.
Welcome, Adrian!! Now... How about a little post?? !! You are amongst friends and need not be afraid! I've been worried that you'll disappear into the shadows again!
Be strong and feel the love, Adrian! ;P I'm sure you have a lot to share... to contribute to the community... Things I can't even began to imagine! I really hope you will take the chance!! It feels like there has been a missing cog in the gears in the past few months! luv, tman<3
Adrian,
I just discovered this blog and it looks promising. I hope you continue.
DP
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