A couple of weeks ago I visited my single brother in his home. He is moving away soon and I knew that I would likely not see him again soon, or for a very long time. With much trepidation I told him the story of my love for my best friend when I was young and that I was gay.
I think at first he thought I was enlisting his help with my marriage. But I said, no, I just wanted and needed him to know. I was so terrified of what his reaction would be. It turned out to be a wonderful, sweet experience. Although I left his home feeling freer than I have in a long time, I will most likely not tell anyone else. My brother is the only person besides my wife that I have trusted enough to come out to. The potential is there for too much hurt. I knew in my heart that my brother would respond the way he did. I also know that the other members of my family would probably not be so understanding.....maybe in time.
About Me
- Adon
- New England, United States
- Having been unable to break my silence about being gay or bisexual due to living in a conservative New England community, and being an active Mormon as well as being married to a wonderful woman, I will try to do so here. This is the story of parts my life, beginning when I was a young teenage boy. I have learned that being gay or bisexual can, in ways, be a lonely life. I was not actually alone, but many times it felt like I was. As a boy, I thrilled at the discoveries that I had made about my body and my physical and emotional attractions. I despaired when I realized I couldn't tell anyone. There were times when things didn't end well. There were some sad and traumatic experiences. But, there were also many joyful and wonderful life experiences that I wouldn’t have had if I had given in to discouragement along the way. I believe there is joy in living even with the challenges along the way. Be aware that I have been honest and to some degree explicit in my boyish descriptions of my budding sexual awareness. What I have written is what I felt, thought and experienced at the time. These particular posts are marked with a double star **.
